Holding on to joy...

It was still dark when I woke up this morning - perhaps because I was eager to get to my early morning doctor's appointment and finally find out the reason for the terrible shoulder and upper arm pain that's been plaguing me for the past seven weeks. Or perhaps it was because my throbbing shoulder had already disturbed me several times in the night, and this was just another wake up call.

For some reason, this got me thinking about the importance of waking up to joy, and finding all the reasons for laughter in our day to day lives.  I think I've been conscious for some time now, probably for a number of years, that I wake up in the morning and often my first thought of the day is how much pain I'm in. It's been twelve years now since I was diagnosed with osteoarthritis and fibromyalgia, and I've got used to the fact that the pain and stiffness are usually at their worst in the morning. But whenever I catch myself waking up to pain, I can't help thinking what a contrast this is to my earlier years in Cape Town, when I was more conscious of waking up to joy. I'd wake up with a sense of anticipation for the day, of thankfulness for the beauty of our setting, or just a smile because one of the dogs had nudged me awake with her nose.  It's not that I'm not thankful for life in Spain, for the warm climate and the beauty of the setting…. I'm just aware of the danger that the physical pain could eclipse everything else and begin to steal my joy.

So that's what prompted my early morning Bible reading today in a variety of passages that speak about laughter and joy. Often what brings back our lost joy is the awareness that God has intervened and done something big for us. In Genesis 21:6, when her son was born, the elderly Sarah said, "God has brought me laughter and everyone who hears about this will laugh with me." In Psalm 126, the returning exiles say, "Our mouths were filled with laughter, our tongues with songs of joy. The Lord has done great things for us and we are filled with joy."

Joy and laughter are often the product of a breakthrough or a turnaround, an awareness that God has done great things for us. Of course, who of us cannot say that the Lord has done great things for us? He loves us and showers us with blessings every day. But what happens when a breakthrough hasn't come and the longed for "great things" haven't happened yet? How do we hold on to joy and laughter, even in those sorts of circumstances? Psalm 126 also contains promises for the "waiting times." Verses five and six tell us that those who sow in tears will reap with songs of joy.

There are times in life, though, when our painful circumstance is one that might not change at all. What is our response when life seems full of "sowing in tears" and we don't particularly have a guarantee that a miracle or a breakthrough is around the corner? I think that what we are sowing is still important, and is a key to whether we maintain joy in our lives. Am I sowing thankfulness, for example, and expressing my thanks to God for his many blessings in my life? Am I sowing encouragement, and speaking uplifting things into the lives of others?

It's ironic that physical pain can be one of the things that steals our joy, because the Bible tells us that laughter and joy can have a positive effect on our physical wellbeing. See, for example, Proverbs 17:22, which tells us that a joyful heart works good healing like a medicine, but a broken spirit dries up the bones. So when pain threatens to break our spirit, we need to be vigilant and surround ourselves with things that bring joy and laughter. It might be family or friends; it might be a hobby or something else we enjoy doing.

Strange as it sounds, I've realised that pets are one of those things for me. Yes, it can be a hassle to have to find pet sitters when you travel for ministry or outreach, but my cats do bring joy and laughter into my life. That's why I joke with friends that one of my dreams is to have a dog again by my sixtieth birthday. Some respond by saying, "When you're sixty; how could you possibly wait that long?" while others say, "How could you possibly have a dog? It doesn't fit with your lifestyle or your travels." The occasional smart guy will joke, "I hear they train assistant dogs to help physically decrepit people!" But when I think about the joy factor involved, I realise that having a dog again one day might not be just an indulgence, but could very well turn out to be a weapon of spiritual warfare.

Friendships are another thing that brings joy into my life, as are nature, the beauty of creation and being in a climate with lots of warm, sunny days. Travel was always something I enjoyed too… although in recent years I've been aware that this has turned into something that also brings physical challenges with it.

So, on a day like today when, eager to find out what's wrong with my shoulder, I sat in the doctor's waiting area for more than half an hour before realising that I'd actually been too eager and my appointment is only for tomorrow…. I can either laugh at myself, or I can allow the throbbing pain to make me cry. I think I have a renewed understanding of why people say it's possible to choose joy… because joy isn't the same as happiness, isn't the same as an easy life, isn't the same as freedom from pain or difficulty. Joy is something deeper; it's a deep sense of security that comes from knowing that "God has done great things for us," from a heart attitude of thankfulness, from an ability to strengthen ourselves in the Lord, and from learning to surround ourselves with the people and things that brighten our day.

If it's true that the joy of the Lord is our strength (Nehemiah 8:10) then the only way we can stay strong for the long haul is if we have learned to draw on God's help, especially in the challenging times of life, to choose joy and to major on the things that bring laughter, strength and positivity into our lives.