Is it time to make some tents?

The question of whether pastors and missionaries should be "full time" workers for the Kingdom of God or whether they should also take on paid employment to support themselves is a longstanding one  - one that has been answered in different ways, in different parts of the world, at different times in history.

The general trend of the New Testament - from the words of Jesus Himself (Luke 10: 5 - 7) to the writings of Paul the missionary (1 Corinthians 9: 6 - 15) seems to say that evangelists and missionaries should receive support for the voluntary work that they do.

However, there are also times when Paul says that he worked to support himself rather than be a burden to the young believers. (Acts 20: 33-34 and 1 Thess 2: 9, for example.) In Acts 18: 3, we read that he actually had skills in the trade of being a tentmaker.

In my own ministry journey, I've been in both of these positions. For my first 9 years of missions involvement, I received no gift income at all; I constantly took "time out" to work as a teacher and earn the money that would support me for my next season of missionary work. Then, from 1988 until now, I have mainly lived on gift income - regular contributions from faithful donors who contribute ten or twenty or fifty pounds a month. Special miracles have still been needed - especially when it came to buying plane tickets for ministry trips, or needing a new computer when the old one died - but for some decades now, I haven't returned to paid employment as a way of funding my calling as a missionary.

I've been aware that I have "marketable skills." Knowing that I won't have a pension in the future as other people do, I've been conscious that my training as a language teacher or as a life coach could both be ways of earning money if I were "retired" and no longer receiving missions support in my "old age." But I've never had a sense that I should take time out from ministry involvement and use those skills to earn money in the here and now. Anyway, for most of my life, the conditions of my non-profit visa have meant that any kind of employment, even self employment, was prohibited. 

In this current season, of discovering that my present income is no longer enough to live on, one person has asked me if I've thought of giving half of my week to earning money and the other half to my voluntary ministry activities.

It's a valid question... but for now the answer is no. I haven't felt that I've to reduce my ministry involvement in order to do other work to fund it (although I'm very aware that tutoring school kids in English or French could become a ministry expression, a wonderful way of meeting teenagers and their families.) But getting "a job" places restraints on your timetable and can be a limiting factor when it comes to participating in outreach projects and other ministry travels to other countries.

So I feel like it's not yet the time for me to do some "tent making," and am trusting that God has a different kind of solution for me in the weeks ahead. 

Exactly as He said...

Today I completed my reading through the biblical book of Exodus. The book began with God's people suffering in slavery... and it ends with their having a beautiful and precious symbol of God's presence in their midst. (The last few chapters, the ones I read today, are all about the completion of the Tabernacle, a visible symbol of God's presence dwelling among them.)

They're not yet in their Promised Land at the end of the book. In fact, they're still in the desert. But it was precisely in that wilderness setting that they established the priority of God's presence. That was a lifestyle choice - a priority that they would take with them to the place where they would finally settle.

Those concluding chapters are full of details about building an altar, making a golden washbasin and lamp stand, sewing clothing for the Levites.... It goes on and on in detail and it's tempting just to skim-read it as something that was important at the time, but not so relevant to us today.

What really did stand out for me, though, is something that is repeated no fewer than eleven times in chapters 39 and 40. Check it out for yourself: 11 times in those concluding chapters we read that the people did everything just as the Lord had commanded them to do.

And what was the result of this wholehearted obedience? It was that the glory of God filled the Tabernacle and His presence visibly dwelt among them - symbolised by the cloud and the fire that guided them day and night. (Exodus 40: 34-35)

Their journey wasn't over yet, but the most important thing was in place: the presence of God lived among them and we read that He continued to guide them "throughout all of their journeys." (vs 38)

Sometimes God guides us in a general sense and He trusts us to fill in the details. He might lead us to live in a certain town or take up a certain employment.... but He doesn't fill in any details about which street we'll live in or what clothes we'll wear to work!

At other times, God guides us in the details, and there's usually a good reason for that. (I remember feeling prompted to catch a certain train between Switzerland and France, and ended up spending the whole journey chatting with a young woman who was really seeking God.)

Whether He just shows us the broad brush strokes or whether He fills in the details of the picture, the important thing for you and me is that we follow His instructions and do things exactly as He said. That will be the key to knowing His presence with us, and it's His presence that makes all the difference. 

Caring for the elderly...

People who know me well would probably describe me as a "dog person." Since childhood I've enjoyed the company of dogs and have had fun walking them and training them. So it was quite a surprise to some people when I moved to Spain in 2008 and suddenly became a cat owner.

Decades of missionary lifestyle had meant that it was seldom possible for me to have a pet of my own... but when I was adopted by a (pregnant) stray cat in my neighbourhood, I discovered that it was easier to leave a cat at home during ministry travels than to leave a dog that had to be taken out for walks. And so began the "cat years" of my life.

I'd had a cat a couple of times in the past, but never had much luck with them. My cats had only lived for a year or two. But my Spanish feline family brought a change to that. I had the mother cat, Tamba, for 7 years, Tobi lived for 12 years, and now my old boy, Teddi, will have his 14th birthday next month.

I've made some fun memories with Teddi over the years - not least the short season in 2015 when he went viral, appearing in newspapers, websites and TV programmes all over the world because of the fact that he had his own YouTube channel and did tricks like a dog would.  You can read one of those old newspaper stories by clicking here.

And so, although it may seem unimportant to some people (it's "only a cat," after all), I feel a responsibility to look after Teddi well and not simply "get rid of him" in his old age.

Teddi has lived most of his life in the house where I currently live. In recent weeks, I've needed to look for new housing - a place where Teddi can go with me, as well as Maiki, the dog who now shares Teddi's YouTube channel. As it began to seem possible that no flats or houses were available within my current budget, one or two people have suggested that perhaps I just need to rent a "room" instead. At least one person has even offered that I can move into the spare room in her flat.

The problem with renting a room instead of a home is that you are usually not allowed to take a cat with you. This kind of rules it out as an option for me, even though one person commented, "But he's an elderly cat; you could just put him to sleep." And the person who has already offered me a room has a dog that growls at cats; I hate to think of Teddi spending his last years locked up in a tiny room with no access to even a balcony and with the stress of being pursued if he happens to set foot out of the bedroom.

And so, despite the fact that renting just a room might seem an obvious option right now, I'm choosing to "care for the elderly" and keep waiting and searching for an option where Teddi and Maiki can be comfortable too. They're the only "family" I have here in Spain and I feel like I owe it to them.

This morning I was remembering some of the times in the past - at least three times came to mind - where I moved to a different country, and so I had to give away all my furniture before I left, or leave it behind for the people who stayed in my housing. This time I'm moving within the same country, and so I have a sense that I should hold on to the furniture God has provided over the years, and not simply give it away so that I can downsize to a single room or a small furnished studio.  

My elderly boy will be grateful for that. 😀

A different way of thinking...

In my early morning Bible reading today, I was reflecting on what we read in Isaiah 55 vs 8 - 9: that God's thoughts are distinctly different and far above ours.

That makes sense, because the thoughts of human beings so easily tend towards the negative, while God's thoughts are in the realm of righteousness and of, "nothing is impossible."

It's a lifelong journey, isn't it? Learning to think the way God thinks and to view life from the Lord's perspective. No wonder the New Testament tells us that we need to have our way of thinking renewed or transformed if we want to be able to discern God's will. (Romans 12: 2)

When it comes to my house hunting journey, I think I've been doing okay so far. Someone in my house group on Tuesday even commented that I seemed quite "relaxed" about the situation. But I was aware yesterday (see post below this one) that the news about having to provide salary slips had robbed me of a little hope - hope of finding a rental home at least.

As I process this news, however, I don't want to fall into the trap of thinking my own thoughts and possible solutions. I want to truly see things through God's eyes. My NLT Bible translation of Isaiah 55: 8 says that His way is, "far beyond anything you could imagine." Ephesians 3: 20 also proclaims that God is able to do infinitely more that we might ask for or even imagine.

I can imagine plenty. I can imagine that finding some kind of private rental is the only way forward (with the usual estate agent channels now closed to me.) I can imagine that a millionaire comes along and buys me a house with a garden and a swimming pool (😀). I can imagine that finding a subletting situation (like when people rent out a room in their home or in their basement) is the only option within reach....  

I can imagine a lot - some of it possible and most of it impossible - but I want to be thinking with God-anointed imagination and not just with my own human thinking and understanding.

I don't want to fall into the same mistake that I made in 1989 - when I realised one day that I didn't have too much of a problem trusting God for the impossible, but I wasn't very good at trusting Him for the possible. The situation at that time was that two friends and I had just moved into a flat together in the city of Vienna. The flat had no washing machine and we were finding it challenging  and time consuming to have to travel around the city on public transport (trams and underground) carrying our dirty laundry to where there was a public laundrette and then lugging the wet washing home again. 

Now, getting a washing machine for the flat was not an impossible task: you could find second hand washing machines in the classified ads of local newspapers (this was before the days of internet!) and the three of us could each contribute some money to buy one and have it installed.... albeit with the risk that the machine would come with no guarantee.

Then, one morning God spoke to me during my quiet time. "You're not really trusting me with all of your life," He said. "You trust me with things that seem really impossible, but when it comes to things that you think are possible for you to do yourself, you don't include me in that." I realised that was true and I repented, telling the Lord that I trusted Him even with this need that we could resolve "on our own."

Some time later, through a series of "coincidences," God used a lady I'd met, a complete stranger to us, to buy us a brand new washing machine for the flat! 

So, in my present situation, I want to remember that God's thoughts are often quite different from my thoughts. I want to trust Him with the options that seem possible to me, as well as with the ones that seem completely out of reach. And I want to grow in seeing all of life, including my own life, from God's perspective.

 

Rentals, red tape and rejection...

When I began house hunting at the beginning of this year, I fully expected that I was going to run into some faith challenges. I had been paying minimal rent for more than a decade and I knew that typical rentals on a house like mine were around five or six times the amount I had been paying.

Even so, it was rather a shock - as I mentioned in a previous post - to discover that even the tiniest of flats or one-roomed studios had a rental that was more than my total monthly income.  I wasn't sure whether I should even go and look at the places available, when I knew that my income was insufficient to cover the cost.

But God has kept reminding me of the principle of stepping out with what we have - even if it seems totally inadequate for the situation. I wrote about that in this blog (see this post from 3rd January) and this week I shared a devotional about it when my home group from church met, probably for the last time, at my house. Different group members then shared their own testimonies of times that they had stepped out in faith and how God had honoured their faith by providing all that they needed.

Yes, I was prepared for the fact that there would be a faith challenge. What I wasn't prepared for was that the system would have changed since the last time I was house hunting, that there would be more red tape than in the past, and that I would constantly find myself being rejected as an undesirable tenant.

I decided this week that I needed at least to visit a few flats and studios - just to see what is available and get a sense of whether God was prompting me to have faith for any place in particular. So I requested a few appointments to visit properties: the system usually involved leaving your phone number in a contact form and waiting for them to phone you to arrange a visit.

Imagine my surprise when I was subjected each time to an interrogation and a speech about the "requisitos" (requirements) for signing a rental contract. Rental contracts are not allowed to be more than 33% of your monthly income, I was told, and so, before arranging for me to visit a flat, they needed proof that I had been in my current employment for more than a year, and I had to provide salary slips to confirm my income over the past three months!!

It wouldn't have surprised me that proof of income was needed if I was looking to arrange a mortgage, but I was stunned to discover that it was also needed for a rental contract. I suppose it's their way of confirming that you're not going to default on the monthly payments.

Of course, I had to go through the usual explanation that I don't have a salary, that I do voluntary work and live from gift income. (In different circumstances, I might have offered to provide three months of bank statements... but I knew that this would only confirm the rental to be an amount higher than my total income.) It didn't seem that this was even an option for them, however. Time and again I discovered that, if I wanted to rent even a one-roomed studio, I needed to have an income of more than €3000 per month, and I needed to prove it with salary slips.

I'm not giving up yet. I'm going to keep looking and keep trying to make appointments to view possible accommodation. But it does feel a little bit as if a door is closing... as if finding a rental property through the usual channels is something that is far out of reach.

There's an old saying that rejection often turns out to be redirection. If you read missionary biographies, there have been many people historically who found doors closing to them (even some, like Gladys Aylward, who were rejected for missionary service) and God used that closed door to direct them into the plans and purposes He had for them. 

So I'm seeking to be sensitive to what the alternatives to the red tape might be. Perhaps a private rental without an estate agent's contract could be an option. Perhaps there's still a future housemate out there somewhere. Some people have even urged me to consider that it might be time to buy a home instead of renting one!

Each option feels just as impossible as the others... so, as we head into the last week of the month, I just keep moving forward at the prompting of a God who specialises in the impossible.

 

The promise or the presence...

Continuing with my daily reading in the book of Exodus, today I came to a chapter that has long been a favourite for me.

After the sad episode  of the golden calf (in Exodus 32 - when the people got tired of waiting for God's timing and decided to build themselves a new god to worship) God speaks to Moses at the beginning of Exodus chapter 33, reassuring him that they are still going to get their promised land, and that He will still send an angel ahead of them to guide them there. However, because of their stubbornness and rebellion, God says that He Himself will no longer travel among them.

You might imagine that their reaction would be one of relief: despite their sin, they weren't going to forfeit the wonderful inheritance that God had promised them. But no, Moses' reaction and the people's reaction was to go into mourning.

You see, as Moses expresses in vs 15-16, they knew that the presence of the living God with us is the only thing that truly distinguishes us from any other people on the face of the earth. And so Moses prays, "If you don't personally go with us, please don't make us leave this place."

In other words, Moses cared more about God's presence than about God's promise. He was saying that they would rather stay there in the desert with the presence of God than travel without the presence of God to the "land flowing with milk and honey" that He had promised them.

I know that I feel the same. In my present circumstances, I am trusting and praying that some miracle will make it possible for me to stay here in Alhaurín de la Torre - my land of "springs and palm trees." I know that such a miracle would be a huge testimony to others who are observing my journey. But I also know that the biggest testimony of all, no matter where I end up living, is the reality of God's presence with me.

God promises Moses, "My presence will go with you and I will give you rest." My NLT Bible translation of verse 14 adds, "Everything will be fine for you." It's not being in a familiar place that gives us rest and security; it's being in the presence of God.

Read on below for more reasons why Exodus 33 is a favourite chapter of mine.

Experiencing God's glory...

Much of Exodus 33 highlights the fact that Moses had a close relationship with God: how they spoke face to face like close friends (vs 11) and how Moses longed not only to see God's marvellous deeds, but also to know and understand His ways (vs 13). In fact, some generations later, David wrote in a psalm that the people of Israel knew God's mighty acts, but Moses knew God's ways. (Psalm 103 vs 7)

With such a strong foundation of friendship, it's not surprising that, at this challenging time on their exodus journey, Moses dared to ask if he could see God's glory. (Exodus 33: 18) I wonder what he expected when he made that request. What would you imagine it's like to see the glory of God? The Bible is full of verses about God's glory and old paintings typically depict it as something bright and shining.

God agrees to reveal His glory to Moses, and what He goes on to do in vs 19 is to reveal something of His character: His goodness, His mercy and compassion... Knowing the nature and character of God is what matters more than anything else. Constantly growing in our knowledge of who God is, no matter what circumstances we happen to be in, is what it truly means to experience His glory.