In the section I was meditating on this morning, the word "turn" stood out to me and I was struck by how the psalmist understood the importance of having the right focus in life. In vs 36 - 37 and then in vs 59 - 60, we read:
To be faithful in following God, our heart (our motivation) needs to be turned towards God's instructions and not towards selfish gain.
Secondly, our eyes need to be turned away from worthless things that could be a distraction to us.
And then we need to take a third and very practical turn: we need to turn our steps without delay to putting God's instructions into practice in our own lives.
The writer of the psalm prays for God's help to turn his heart to the Word and to turn his eyes away from distractions... but then he takes personal responsibility for the needed action step, saying, "I have turned my steps to your commands. I will hasten and not delay to obey your instructions."
Turn my heart, turn my eyes, turn my steps... This is the sort of focus involved in seeking God wholeheartedly and experiencing His help to live life well.
So much had happened before that point: they got the news of John the Baptist's death, then Jesus taught crowds of people all day and the disciples found themselves with the task of feeding fish and bread to thousands of people in a remote location. After that, while sailing back across the lake, they found themselves in a frightening storm... and suddenly they thought that they saw a ghost!
I don't know if they vaguely recognised Jesus walking towards them on the water and started to think that He was dead... or whether there was no recognition until He said to them, "Don't be afraid.... I am here." (vs 27)
Bereavement, tiredness, crisis, fear, uncertainty... this was the backdrop to Peter's walking on the water.
The story is well known: as long as Peter kept his eyes on Jesus, he was doing fine. More than fine, he was experiencing a miracle, something impossible. But when he focused on the wind and waves, he was terrified and began to sink.
As I read the story, it struck me that I have experienced some similar pressures this year:
And amidst these "storm factors," I'm contemplating stepping out and buying a home! Walking on water... as home owning feels so uncertain and out of reach. Something within me is saying like Peter, "Is that really You, Lord?" (vs 28) And another part of me is intimidated by how little I know about the process of buying or owning a home.
But if I'm going to step "out of the boat,' I need to keep my eyes on Jesus and not on the circumstances. I need to activate my faith, I need to say, "Save me, Lord," and I need to keep worshipping Him (vs 33) for who He is.
It's one of the mysteries of the incarnation - that God Himself, the Creator and Owner of the universe, left the splendour of heaven and came to live a humble life among mankind on earth. He was born in a stable because there was "no room" at the inn. His earthly parents were simple people; we would probably describe them as "poor." Yet Jesus' material poverty opened the way for each one of us to experience spiritual riches.
For most of my life, I've lived on very little. I remember when I started out as a missionary, I needed to raise £150 to live on and I trusted God to give me 15 partners who would each support me with £10 a month. For many years in Africa, right up to 2007, I lived on an income of £200 a month... and yet I never felt "poor" or in need. I lived simply, I was never in need, and God even provided a nice car when I needed one.
It's only been this year, for the first time, that I've felt the weight of being "poor." It's not that I've been destitute or starving; I've always had enough to eat, I still have a nice car and I even have some savings in the bank... but losing my home this year confronted me with the sober reality that I simply didn't have enough income to rent a new place to live. Even the most humble accommodation came with a price tag that was considerably higher than my total monthly income. And when I plucked up the courage to investigate the option of buying instead of renting, I discovered that my budget would restrict me to looking in "poor" areas... like the neighbourhoods typically inhabited by gypsies and travellers.
So it kind of caught my attention when I read in the devotional this morning that Jesus "lived as a homeless man for years." It wasn't that Jesus was sleeping in the street, like a down and out, but it's certainly true that He did spend the latter years of His life dependent on the hospitality of others. He Himself described it as having "nowhere to lay His head." What a radical commitment He made in order to reconcile us with the Father.
I've only experienced that homelessness in a small way this year, and it's been humbling; I've felt very vulnerable at times. For the first time in my life, I feel "poor" and without resources... and yet I know that my Heavenly Father created and owns the entire universe. All I can do is trust that my life is in His care, just as He cared for His own Son when He was here on earth.
During the last ten days of October, I was in Albania for the annual regional gatherings of KKI Europe. Four days with our regional leadership team (ELT) were followed by two days with KKI national leaders from across the continent, and then by three days with a larger gathering of young and old.
Our theme for this KKI gathering was "Launch the Wave,” and we sought God’s heart for how to launch the next big wave of missionaries to take the gospel to the nations of Europe.
It was interesting to remember how Loren Cunningham (recently deceased founder of Youth with a Mission) when he was only 20 years old had a vision of waves of young people - "my age and younger" - taking the gospel to the nations of the earth. So it was fitting that more than two thirds of the participants at our KKI gathering were under 25 years of age, and the remaining third was people aged 25 - 70.
We had some extended times of worship, prayer and ministry, as well as looking ahead to exciting outreach initiatives that will be held in 2024 and 2025. We expect to send many teams to France during the Olympic Games next year, and to have another SHINE event, possibly in the UK, during 2025.
Recently I was reading the biblical account of a man called Job. If you’ve heard a little of his story, you’ll know that he suffered a great many losses and challenges at one point in his life. Even though Job mistakenly believed that it was God who was causing all these bad things to happen in his life, he showed amazing resilience at first, choosing to bless and trust God instead of blaming Him.
What made it all just too much for him to bear, however, was when a few of his so-called friends came on the scene. Perplexed by the terrible things that were happening to Job, these four men began to judge and criticise him. “God must be punishing you for your sin,” they told him. “Bad things don’t happen to good people.”
Seeing the way that these men’s words wounded and discouraged Job got me reflecting on the power of community and the incredible power of our words - both for good and for bad.
Most of us have faced hard situations in life where we felt that we just weren’t able to make it on our own. Often the thing that helps us to keep going and not give up is the prayers and support, help and encouragement of others who rally round in our time of need. Even the Beatles recognised this in the well known 1967 song, “I can get by with a little help from my friends.”
But community can have a negative effect on us too - like when we see teenagers who are influenced by peer pressure into drinking and drugs … or young people who get caught up in some sort of sect or cult that makes them feel loved and valuable but leads them down a wrong path.
The Bible says in Proverbs 18: 21 that the words we speak have the power of life and death…. and each one of us can choose which kind of words we speak to (and about) others.
I’ve seen these two forces at work even during these past months of being homeless. A considerable number of people have written to me or phoned me to share Bible verses and words of encouragement. Those words have been life-giving, infusing me with the strength to persevere in an extremely difficult and stressful time.
Sometimes, though, I’ve heard on the grapevine that someone is judging and criticising my decision to stay in Spain and keep trusting God for a breakthrough. Such people no doubt feel that my time as a missionary may be over, and that I should therefore not try to stay in Spain any more. It’s hard to describe the sense of discouragement that comes from learning that people are saying such things behind your back. Somehow, a bit like Job experienced, it makes an already challenging situation feel even heavier to bear.
I’m not speaking about people who’ve written to me and honestly raised the question of whether I should be considering leaving Spain. That kind of question is good and necessary, and I’m actually very thankful for the people who have had the courage to ask me that. What’s hard is when you become aware that people are judging you for seeking to be faithful and obedient to God… but they’ve never spoken to you directly about what you and others are hearing from the Lord.
When we read the word “you” in the New Testament, it’s often plural. We don’t always realise that if we’re reading in English. The Bible is full of “one another” scriptures: about loving one another, bearing one another’s burdens, forgiving one another, encouraging one another, exhorting one another, serving one another … The concept of community is deeply embedded in the biblical understanding of living by faith. So it’s kind of sobering to realise that we in Christian community can make life’s hard times a little lighter for others …. or we can make them a little heavier. I am incredibly thankful for the people who pray for me - exhorting or encouraging me on a regular basis.
Who represents “community” for you in your present context? And what are you doing this week or this month to strengthen and encourage them for the road ahead?