Christmas presents...

Well, I hardly dared to believe it (things have fallen through so many times over the past two years) but now I really do have a new home for 2025. I moved all my furniture over to the flat yesterday, even as cleaners (friends from my church) were busy deep-cleaning the whole apartment. Today and tomorrow, I'm packing everything else into my storage shed, as well as deep cleaning the place I've been in for the past few months. I also needed to take my dog to meet the family (and baby!) where she'll be staying over the next month while I'm in the UK.

My new landlord will still be doing some repairs and some re-painting while I am gone, so that everything will be ready for me to move in when I return in January.

It's been an interesting "coincidence" for me that the two neighbours in the flats upstairs from mine are ladies that I've often met while walking the dogs.... and this morning I discovered yet another "coincidence" about my new location. While my hairdresser was cutting my hair this morning and I was explaining where my new place will be, she suddenly gave a gasp and said, "You'll be the next door neighbour to my sister. She's in the other ground floor flat in that building!" So it turns out that there's already a relational connection with all three of my neighbours, and I am trusting that God will deepen the friendships over the coming months, as well as re-strengthening connections with my former neighbours who'll be not too far away now.

What a nice Christmas present - to have not only a new place to live, but also new neighbours to reach out and share my faith with. God is good.

(Photo shows one of our Alhaurín roundabouts at Christmas time.)

 

Are you an Ethan or a Heman?

Over the past week, I've been reading some psalms from the Old Testament. Perhaps you know that the Bible contains 150 psalms, divided into 5 books. This morning, I was reading the last two psalms in the third book. Psalm 88 was written by a man called Heman the Ezrahite, while Psalm 89 was written by a man called Ethan the Ezrahite. These two men were from the same tribe and were living through the same time in history, yet their two psalms could not be more radically different.

Psalm 88 is full of despair. The writer says in verse 3, "My life is full of troubles and death draws near." Even the melody of the psalm, according to the title, is a tune called, "The Suffering of Affliction."

Psalm 89 is in complete contrast, full of praise for God's unfailing love. Ethan declares the nature and character of God: His creative power, His unfailing truth, His righteousness and justice. Heman, on the other hand, writes about God's anger and accuses Him of injustice.

Heman and Ethan, both Ezrahites, both writers of psalms. Were their situations really so radically different, or is the difference in tone more because Ethan chose thankfulness while Heman chose self-pity?

Ethan is very clear in vs 15-18 of Psalm 89: it is those who respond to the call to worship who will know God's presence, His strength and His protection.

As we read on in the last fifteen verses of Ethan's psalm, we discover that he is also grappling with hard questions. He's wondering whether God has rejected them (rejected the people of Israel and their king, David) because of their disobedience. His life is no simpler or easier than that of his relative, Heman.

But amidst all his questions and doubts, Ethan refuses self-pity and chooses instead to praise God and trust in His unfailing character. That's what makes all the difference.

When troubles come, am I an Ethan or a Heman?

What about you? Whatever you're facing right now, is your response more like Heman's self-pity or more like Ethan's choice to praise God? That choice will make all the difference in the world.

Counting the cost... and celebrating breakthrough

In my recent (December 2024) newsletter, I shared an overview of my 2-year journey to find a new home here in Spain and the societal factors that have made the search so difficult.

I am incredibly grateful to those of you who wrote to share Bible verses or words of encouragement, urging me not to give up but to "hang in there" and trust for a breakthrough. Others of you wrote, humbly confessing that you hadn't in fact been praying for my housing; that it was hard to persevere in prayer for a situation that was continuing over such a long time frame.... and I totally understand that. Thank you for your humility and honesty, and for your renewed prayers in recent days.

As time has gone by with seemingly no answer to prayer (except for all the short term housing options God has provided for me), I've been only too aware that for some people this raised the question of whether it was God's timing for me to leave Spain. One person in particular was rather vocal in the belief that my lack of housing meant it was time for me to retire from missions, to leave Spain and to move back to the UK.

Believe me, despite all the assurances to the contrary, I have regularly asked God that same question over the past two years. As far back as last summer, I typed up a list of everything I would need to do if the time ever came for me to leave here. It was a long, complex and costly list, including things like:

• filling in all the government paperwork to surrender my Spanish residency and my right to ever live in Spain again in the future
• surrendering my Spanish healthcare card and re-applying to get into the British NHS
• handing in my Spanish driving licence and re-applying for a British one
• closing my Spanish bank account
• selling my car and giving away my furniture, kitchen appliances, etc.
• finding a family to adopt my dog 
• resigning from all the teams and roles I hold as a missionary; finding people to take my place in some of those teams
• letting all my prayer partners know that I will no longer be a missionary and therefore no longer a recipient of their financial gifts

And those are just some of the things that would need to happen before I left Spain; the list includes other things that would need to happen once I was back in the UK... things like finding a doctor and dentist.... and probably some kind of part time job to support myself in the future. Reading the list was heartbreaking, and was one of the main factors that made me very wary of taking such a big, life-changing step without complete certainty that it was what God was asking of me.

Then a few things began to happen in recent weeks. One Sunday, the pastor stood up in church and led a special prayer time for all the people in the congregation that were homeless. After the service, a woman came to me and said that her sister was an estate agent and had access to some property listings that didn't have squatters in them. Her sister turned out to be someone I had met in the street a couple of times, as she got a border collie puppy around the same time that I got Maiki. She's been taking me to see one or two properties for sale in Alhaurín and in another nearby town. (Nothing suitable yet, but at least things are beginning to move.)

Over this past week, one of my homeless church friends phoned me.  She had been offered a flat for rent, but, with only two bedrooms, it was too small for their family of five, which includes grown up children. Would I be interested in viewing it? It's centrally located in the main avenue of the town, and so I made an arrangement to view it after church today.

Then, during church, a second option presented itself. An American lady who is renting a house in the next town (about 15 km away) told me she was looking for a housemate and would love to share with me if I'm open to it.  So, I also went to visit her place after church today.  Suddenly, after months of no options, two places became available in the same day.

The challenge with the second house was that it was full of antique furniture and displays of china; my friend didn't yet know if the owners would be open to having a dog in the property.

The first little flat, on the other hand, was very simple, even slightly "worn" looking, as the previous renters, who just moved out a few days ago, had broken some light fittings and obviously allowed their cats to damage some of the furniture.  I told the landlord that I had furniture of my own, and he said he'd be happy to get rid of all the old stuff that was there, as it wasn't his original furniture anyway. When he heard I was going to the UK for a month over Christmas, he said he'd carry out repairs of the light fittings, fix things up in general and repaint the shabby outdoor patio while I was gone... but that I could store my furniture in the flat during December, and start paying rent from January. (Initially he said he'd waive the one-month deposit they usually ask for, but then realised he'd need the money to fix things up.)

It's not my "dream home," but it will be a stable place for me to live while I continue the search for a permanent home to buy... which should hopefully become easier after the government passes the anti-squatting law. (Click here to read about that. The law was passed by Congress, then rejected by the Senate and is currently still being debated.) 

The flat is in the town centre, in an apartment block that has a pizza restaurant on the ground floor (but not so close that I would be able to smell pizza cooking, haha.) It has two small bedrooms, an internal patio where I could hang up my laundry, and an underground parking garage so that I wouldn't need to search for parking out on the street.

After two years of searching, this is finally a solution that will allow me to have a place of my own while I continue to look for something more permanent. It's close to my old neighbourhood, so I will easily be able to see all my old neighbours and take their dogs for a walk with mine. Perhaps the most amusing thing of all is that the neighbours in the two flats that look down on my patio are ladies that I've known for several years, as we've often met while walking our dogs. They were quite excited to learn that I might be their new neighbour.

Two of the things that have made it impossible to find rental property have been a) that the landlords demand proof of income, not wanting the rental contract to be more than 20% of your salary, and b) that most landlords are unwilling to rent to someone with a cat or dog. So it was completely unusual today that this homeowner asked for no proof of income and was perfectly happy for me to move in with a dog. It certainly seems to be a door that God is opening in response to renewed prayer over the past week.

If all goes well with the lawyers and preparing the contract, the arrangement will be confirmed next week - allowing me to leave my furniture in the flat while I travel over Christmas, and then to move in when I return in January.

If this indeed is God's provision for the coming season, I look forward to giving you the news very soon.

(The photo above shows the location of the flat in the main street of the town, while the marker more to the right of the photo shows the location of the house that I lived in for 13 years.)

Obedience, sacrifice or sacrificial obedience...?

I've been reading through some of the Old Testament psalms in recent weeks, and two words seem to keep cropping up a lot. One is obedience and the other is sacrifice.

In fact, both words are recurring themes in the Bible as a whole, but it's interesting that God keeps bringing them to my attention in a season where I've sometimes found myself in a position of having to make a choice between the two.

The Bible tells some stories that are examples of sacrificial obedience - obeying God even when it is very costly for us. An Old Testament example would be in the book of Esther, where Queen Esther risks her own life in order to save her people. A New Testament example would of course be Jesus Himself, who obeyed God and sacrificed His own life in order to purchase salvation for mankind. The phrase sacrificial obedience is so common in Christian circles that it would be very easy for us to believe that they are always one and the same thing.

Of course, they're not. The people who wrote the psalms, for example, often speak of their joyful obedience or their willing obedience - of times when God's favour and blessing are so obvious that it's a joy to obey Him and there seems to be no sacrifice involved at all. Obedience and sacrifice are not always the same thing.

This was a principle that God sought to impress on the very first king of Israel, King Saul. In 1 Samuel 15: 22, Saul was told, "To obey is better than to make a sacrifice." Pressurised by people and circumstances, Saul had rushed to offer up a sacrifice, believing that it would ensure God's blessing on himself and his army. (I wrote about this incident in a blog post a few months ago: see here.)

But, speaking through the prophet Samuel, God tells Saul very clearly: It is not your sacrifice that brings blessing; it is your obedience.

In the psalm I was reading this morning, Psalm 40, we can see that God has impressed that same lesson on the heart of Saul's successor, King David. In that psalm, David says to the Lord: I finally understand that you don't take delight in sacrifice; that's not what you require of us. What you're looking for is obedience, and I take joy in doing your will, my God, for your instructions are written on my heart.

Of course, sometimes obedience is costly for us because our desires and our priorities are not always the same as God's. But it's important for us to understand, like David, that sacrifice and obedience are not always the same thing. Sometimes we have to make a choice between them. Sometimes true obedience requires us, unlike Saul, to have enough faith not to make the sacrifice. 

An anniversary...

Today is an anniversary. It is exactly 16 years ago today that I moved to live in Spain. It means that I have lived in this town of Alhaurín longer than I have lived anywhere else in my entire life. Moving here wasn't specifically "planned" at the time, yet when I look back I can see how God has confirmed very specifically, again and again, that this is the place He wanted me to be. 

If you were already reading this blog back in 2008, you might remember the incredibly specific Bible verse about the 12 springs and 70 palm trees; that was only one of the ways that God confirmed the rightness of my being here. 

When you’ve lived somewhere for a long time, leaving it permanently can be a very challenging transition. I can still remember how traumatic it was for me to leave South Africa after living there for almost fifteen years. Suddenly, absolutely everything in my life was changed or simply lost.

I lost my home; I lost my friends and team mates; I lost my church and my missions/ministry involvement. I had to give away my car, my furniture, my books and all kinds of other things that it is impossible to take with you when you change continents. I lost my dog and my cat… and although they lived quite a number of years after that, I never saw either of them again before they died.

I moved to a situation where everything was different: different culture, different language, different way of doing things, different church, different ministry opportunities…

That’s the way things are if you’re single. When a couple or a family move to another location, they take their team with them. When a single person relocates, they lose absolutely everything and have to start completely from scratch. There were many times in those early years when I reflected that I felt like a refugee. I’d had to leave everyone and everything behind and it felt like I was starting life and ministry from scratch. There was a long period of loss and grieving as I made such a huge transition.

I knew that, one day, the “new place” would become home, but until that happened, I felt cast adrift, having to learn a new language, make new friendships and build a new life as a missionary in a completely different setting.

And now, here we are, many years down the road. It’s amazing for me to realise that I have now lived in Spain even longer than I lived in South Africa. Today marks the 16th anniversary of my moving to Spain.

Eight years ago, I was invited to consider moving to another part of the world to pioneer a new ministry there. I remember counting the cost - realising that Spain had become home and that leaving here would likely be just as costly as it had been for me to leave Cape Town…. perhaps even more so, as I was almost sixty, and “starting from scratch” is even more challenging when you’re in an “older” stage of life. I confess to feeling a sense of relief when God confirmed that He was not in fact asking me to make that move.

Almost another decade has gone by since then and I’m at the age when some people give up work and retire. I don’t at all sense at this point that the Lord is prompting me to retire from missions, but I have given some thought to the question of where I should live if I ever do retire. And I realise that it would be here in Spain. The climate is so much better for my lungs and my arthritis than colder places in northern Europe, including the country where I was born and from where I hold a passport.

The world has also changed a lot since I’ve been here. In particular, Britain’s decision to exit the European Union has had huge implications for missionaries serving in Europe or for those who might hope to end their days here.

Fortunately, I got my Spanish residency before Brexit happened. I still had some battles to get back into the healthcare system, but at least I didn’t lose my residency and find myself restricted to just “90 days in Europe” at a time. But if I ever leave Spain, and lose my treasured residency, it would be extremely difficult, probably impossible, for me to get a visa to move back here again. And the same would be true for any other country in Europe. Any departure from here would be as permanent as my long ago departure from South Africa has been.

So today, on this anniversary, I look back and thank God for the many different ways that He demonstrated His faithfulness in the past. I honestly do not know all that the future holds, but as I seek to stay close to Him and obey Him, I know I can thank Him in advance for the many different ways that He will demonstrate His faithfulness in the future.

In what ways do you celebrate the faithfulness of God in your life?

What made these women wise?

I was translating for our church service this morning. It's something I do several times a month - wearing headphones and translating the Spanish into English for visitors to the church or for members whose grasp of Spanish is not strong.

Today we came to the end of a four-week series on stewardship - on what it means to be faithful with everything that the Lord has entrusted to us. One week we looked at stewardship of our time, another week at stewardship of our finances and possessions, and still another week at stewardship of our gifts and talents. Today, for the last preaching in the series, the pastor was speaking about "integrated stewardship" - how it all fits together.

From passages in Matthew's Gospel chapters 24 and 25, he was asking the question: What does God expect of us if we are to be good stewards and hear His commendation: "Well done, good and faithful servant." ?

The two parables in Matthew 25 are well known: 

• the parable of the wise and foolish virgins with their lamps
• the parable of the three servants with their talents

Sermons on these two parables typically focus on the obvious: 

• using our talents rather than burying them
• being alert and ready for the Lord's return

So it was interesting that some of the truths the pastor highlighted this morning went beyond the usual surface explanations of these two stories that Jesus told. He highlighted aspects like looking ahead and being faithful to God for the long term, rather than being pressurised by an immediate need in the present.

For example, when the "foolish" girls ask the "wise" ones to give them some oil for their lamps, the ones commended for being wise say, "No." 

That might shock us. Their response may seem selfish, lacking in compassion or generosity. But the reason given (vs 9) makes it quite clear why those girls were wise. If they had given away some of their oil, none of the girls, neither the wise nor the foolish, would have had enough oil to do what the Lord, the Bridegroom, was asking of them: to keep their lamps burning right to the end, as long as God was asking them to.

The principle is this: If we give beyond what God is asking of us, we are not being good stewards; we are being "foolish."

Being compassionate, giving generously, and even sacrificing ourselves to do so, can all be very commendable. But such behaviour is only "wise" if it is not to the detriment of what God has entrusted to us, of what He actually asked us to do.

Reflecting later, I realised that the first two parables in Matthew 25 illustrate a few different ways that we can be poor stewards of what God has given us:

The first, illustrated by the story of the ten girls warns against:

• not being ready, not being sufficiently prepared
• not being wise, giving beyond what God wants or expects of us

The second parable warns against:

• holding back out of fear or self interest; having a wrong picture of God
• neglecting what we were asked to do and thus failing to be fruitful with what God has entrusted to us

Perhaps it's our personality that determines which of the mistakes we're most likely to fall into. But if we want to hear His, "Well done," we need to be wise in how we steward what He has given us and asked of us.

The prophet, the lion and the danger of guidance from other people...

I've worked most of my life with children and teenagers, discipling them in how to be faithful followers of Jesus. I believe that one of the most important things we can teach our children and youth is how to hear God's voice for themselves. As believers, if we don't know how to hear from God, we become vulnerable and risk becoming gullible too.

God speaks in many different ways; in the Bible, we see Him speaking to people through angels and dreams, as well as through prophets and visions. But, as we work with the young people, we often tell them that the three most common ways God speaks to us are:

1. through the Bible
2. through prayer
3. through other people

It's this third way - through other people - that we need to be careful with. God often chooses to speak to us through the wisdom of other people: through a preacher in church, through a friend who prays for us, through a prophet who gives us a "word"... 

But we simply can't afford to be indiscriminate in following the counsel of others. We need to "test" what we've heard, checking it against the teaching of the Bible and against what God has been speaking to us personally. Words from others are almost always a confirmation of what God has already been saying to us; they are very seldom something brand new and different. Paul tells the Thessalonians not to quench the Holy Spirit and not to despise words of prophecy... but always to test them to be sure that they are really from the Lord. (1 Thessalonians 5 vs 20 - 21)

Nowhere is this more dramatically illustrated than in the Old Testament story I read this morning in 1 Kings chapter 13.

The story takes place just after the kingdom of Israel has been divided into two. The southern kingdom is called Judah, and it retains the city of Jerusalem as its capital, together with the recently built Temple for worshipping the Lord. The northern kingdom keeps the name Israel, but its king sets up golden calves and an alternative religious system for the people. (He's afraid that he might lose the people's allegiance if they keep going down to Jerusalem to worship.)

As 1st Kings chapter 13 begins, God sends a "man of God" from Judah to the northern kingdom of Israel, to denounce the pagan altar that King Jeroboam has set up in Bethel.  We're not told how old this man is, but he obviously knows how to hear God's voice because part of what he prophesies (that the altar will split apart) happens right there and then, and we know from later scriptures that the other part of his prophecy (the birth of a child king named Josiah) also comes true.

So sure is he of what he has heard from the Lord, that he refuses the king's invitation to stay for something to eat and drink, and he begins to head straight home to Judah, exactly as God had told him to.

But, for reasons we're not told, an older prophet pursues him and lies to him, telling him that an angel has brought a command from the Lord  - for the man to eat and drink at the older prophet's home. The man from Judah complies, perhaps reasoning that the other man is "older and wiser."

In doing so, he disobeys what God has specifically spoken to him, and later he pays for it with his life - killed by a lion that he wouldn't have run into if he had gone straight home earlier like God told him to.

It's a sober warning for us. We're probably not going to have deceptive older prophets lying to us, but it's very likely that we'll regularly have well-meaning people giving us their opinion on what they think we should do. We need to respond in humility - taking that input from others and "testing" it before the Lord, as Paul told the Thessalonians to do. 

It's encouraging when someone gives us a word that confirms something God has already been showing us... but indirect revelation can also be a trap for us. We always need to remember that God will hold us personally accountable for whether we've obeyed what He Himself told us ... and not what we heard "second hand" from others.